“You were born different. There are many people who choose to be different. They enjoy going against the grain or revel in tipping sacred cows. Yet after their fling with rebellion is over, they return to the status quo- often embracing it more powerfully than they did before. You, on the other hand, never really felt like you belonged. There may have been a lot of upsets in your early upbringing. Perhaps your family moved around a lot or there were times when one or maybe even both parents had to be away for extended periods. Then again you might have come on the scene a little too early or too late to enjoy the comfort and security of a stable environment. There is an out-of-sync quality built into your psyche. An unsettling restlessness makes you uncertain as to whether you should stay or go. Loved ones may chide you, saying you just don’t know what you want. Friends might make light of your tendencies to “rock the boat.” Yet what drives you isn’t so much a profound dissatisfaction as it is an innate sense that you’re just not getting it. There must be something more to what you’re looking at. You can’t help feeling like you’re poring over the small corner of a far bigger picture.”(according to Astrologist Christopher Renstrom)
Funnily enough, this feels like me to an asbolute T!
Yes, I’m bored at work this Thursday; take no heed, thankyouverymuch.
So sad. Just goes to show that depression doesn’t discriminate and how serious the illness can be left untreated or ignored. It can, for some, be so insidious, even for those who “have it all” by society’s standards, such as poor Cathriona. I rarely comment here on ONTD anymore for some reason this story has really touched me deeply and my heart bleeds for her family and loved ones. IMO, Carrey’s words about her was quite eloquent and beautiful:
“…She was a truly kind and delicate Irish flower, too sensitive for this soil, to whom loving and being loved was all that sparkled.”
Many of us with depression (and/or suicidal ideation/tendencies) know how the drudgery of ife – even the most mundane, day-to-day aspects of living – can wear out one’s soul. If left alone too long, festering, one’s chances of life are hugely diminished, as we can see here. I don’t mean any disrespect to Cathriona, her family and her friends. It’s usually impossible to know the depths someone has reached unless that person can find a way to share it, but in doing so can be and feel daunting and seem even more burdensome in and of itself, hence depressions insidious nature ala the downward spiral.